Present-day Lara

I’d rather be playing Astrosmash

And in all honesty, I’d rather spend time with that classic 1980s system and its touchpad-telephone controllers than play Angel of Darkness. Every single aspect of this game presents one annoyance or another, starting with install bugs (I had to restart the install process three times because of various run-time errors) and continuing with the plot, which involves Lara coming under suspicion for the murder of her old mentor Werner von Croy. Unlike the previous Tomb Raiders, the new release is largely set in present-day Paris and Prague. Yes, they’re old cities, but they’re not exactly Angkor Wat or Cairo. You spend much of your time in modern apartment buildings, alleyways, rooftops, cafés and the like, playing secret agent. There isn’t more than a hint of archaeology until level 12, when you visit a dig site and underground tomb. Even then, you’re down there for just a few levels before it’s back to the surface and more action-hero stuff in city streets and research labs.

Peek-a-boo

Sneak attack

On all fours, huh?

The best way to see Paris

Don't look down

Groovy colored lighting

Yawn. Maybe Core has changed the focus of the game to better represent the new Tomb Raider: Cradle of Life movie, which by the advertisements seems to be more of a female XXX or Bond movie than anything to do with the original Tomb Raider focus. Regardless, a lot of character has been lost. If not for Lara’s clipped accent and two other trademark assets (three if you count the ponytail), this could be a generic action-adventure with any run-of-the-mill, non D-cup protagonist (hey, I made it to the fourth paragraph). You even get to play such a nondescript character at certain times during the game, a shoot-first, screw-the-questions guy named Kurtis Trent who seems to have been dropped in from one of Capcom’s survival horror titles. I understand the marketing need to line the game up with the new movie, although I don’t see the point of making play so damn beige in the process.